#1: The Way In Which We Move

In the wake of our 3rd full day in Sturgeon Bay, Wisconsin everything is starting to surge into full view. It’s a funny feeling, this unclung, driftless, uncertain, spasmodic living. I’m not 100% for it but I’m also not 1% against it. I’ve written one negative nancy journal entry that sent me into a wee bit of a spiral but nothing a good nap couldn’t change.

As 29-year-olds, my husband Gabe and I picked up our entire lives and returned back to our homestate with no jobs, no house, and barely any savings (I can actually see all of your eyes blugging out of their sockets as you read. Believe me, ours are too.). Our moms, Holly and Cynthia, voted to help us a few days before our departure date in order to give us some company, cleaning hands, as well as some much needed (we would later find out) packing space. We split the drive in 2; 8 hours to Lincoln, NE and 10 hours to Sturgeon Bay. Now we self-quarantine and head up to Gabe’s folks cabin, a couple hours due Northwest from Door County.

The original summer plan was for Gabe to set off to a new job/adventure as a fly-fishing guide in Southwestern Alaska for three months while I holed up in the boonies of Pennsylvania as a sort of self-induced cello residency. This was going to be our summer of glory. Both of us working hard towards our goals in the very niche industries we adore. We would reconvene back in Wisconsin at the beginning of September and figure out where we wanted to settle and move forward from there. But with the drop of the a hat (or an epidemic), things changed.

I know in the grand scheme of things, we’ve got it good. Our parents are godsends. Our resumes are pretty stacked and we’ve got something in the bank. But damn, this one helluva way to spend our first year as a married couple. Nevertheless, the coolest part of it all is beginning again. Now it’s not a completely clean slate. We grew up in this great state and still have wonderful connections. Both of our families live here and we’ve got plenty to fill our time. The challenge now becomes bringing what we learned in a very different part of the country and molding it into something that feels authentic and grown.

There are a lot of things we’ve both run away from and partially healed in our almost 7 years in Colorado. Now we have to look closely at what has actually healed and what remains a partially open wound. This first year back is gonna be tough. We’ve dropped ourselves back into a familiar forest but without any compass or clothes to cover our backs.

But we’re here and we’re healthy and that’s all that truly counts.